Are you a faithful or a traitor?

Why So Many of Us Are Watching The Traitors: A Therapeutic Reflection on Human Behaviour

Ten million people tuned into the most recent final of The Traitors with over Fourteen Million watching the celebrity spin off, what is it that we find so compelling?

It’s hard to miss the cultural pull of The Traitors. Conversations in waiting rooms, group chats, and social media all seem to circle back to the same questions: Who can you trust? Who is lying? How would I behave in that situation?

From a therapeutic perspective, our collective fascination with The Traitors makes a lot of sense. At its core, the show isn’t really about the game. It’s about people — under pressure, in relationship, navigating fear, loyalty, power, and belonging.

And those are themes we are endlessly drawn to, because they are deeply human.

A Safe Window Into the Human Condition

One of the reasons The Traitors is so compelling is that it creates a contained space where human behaviour is intensified and observable. It’s a kind of psychological microcosm.

In therapy, we often slow things down to notice patterns: how people respond to uncertainty, how they manage threat, how they relate to others when trust feels shaky. The Traitors speeds all of that up and places it in front of us.

We watch people:

• form alliances

• project meaning onto small behaviours

• make decisions based on fear rather than evidence

• struggle with guilt, secrecy, and moral conflict

• seek safety through belonging

These are not “reality TV behaviours” — they are everyday human responses, just under a spotlight.

The Question of Trust

Trust sits at the heart of the show. Who can I rely on? Who is safe? Who is deceiving me?

From an attachment perspective, uncertainty around trust activates deep nervous system responses. When we don’t know who is safe, our brains look for clues — tone, facial expressions, inconsistencies. We become hyper-vigilant.

Watching others do this is strangely soothing. It externalises a process many of us carry internally. We recognise it because we’ve lived it — in families, friendships, workplaces, and intimate relationships.

The show invites viewers into the same question therapy often explores:How do I decide who to trust — and what happens when that trust is broken?

Projection, Bias, and the Stories We Tell Ourselves

Another compelling aspect of The Traitors is how quickly people form narratives about each other. Someone “feels off.” Someone is “too quiet.” Someone is “too confident.”

As humans, we are meaning-making creatures. When information is incomplete, we fill in the gaps.

In therapeutic work, we talk about projection — the unconscious process of attributing our own fears, feelings, or experiences onto others. The Traitors shows this in real time. People project past betrayals, authority issues, or moral assumptions onto strangers — often with complete conviction.

As viewers, we do the same. We choose favourites. We judge decisions. We align ourselves with certain players. And in doing so, we learn something about ourselves.

Morality Under Pressure

The show also raises uncomfortable questions about morality. What happens to our values when survival, money, and group belonging are at stake?

Traitors often struggle not because they’re “bad,” but because holding deception in relationship creates emotional strain. Guilt, anxiety, and cognitive dissonance show up in the body — something therapists see often when people act against their internal values.

For viewers, this tension is captivating. We’re watching people negotiate the gap between who they believe they are and what the situation requires of them.

That tension — between self-image and behaviour — is one of the most explored themes in therapy.

Belonging, Exclusion, and Fear

At a deeper level, The Traitors taps into a primal fear: exclusion.

Being voted out, turned against, or publicly rejected triggers something ancient in us. Humans are wired for connection. Social exclusion once meant danger.

When we watch contestants plead their case, feel misunderstood, or desperately try to stay in the group, we recognise the emotional stakes — because most of us have felt them in some form.

The show becomes a mirror for experiences many people carry quietly: not being believed, not being chosen, not being seen accurately.

Why We Can’t Look Away

Ultimately, The Traitors holds our attention because it reflects something true: when certainty disappears, human behaviour becomes raw, revealing, and deeply relational.

We’re not just watching for entertainment. We’re watching to understand:

• how people cope with uncertainty

• how trust forms and fractures

• how power and fear shape behaviour

• how quickly narratives take hold

• how people try to protect themselves and each other

From a therapeutic lens, the fascination isn’t surprising at all. We are endlessly curious about people — especially when they are stripped back to their emotional core.

The Traitors gives us permission to observe the human condition from a safe distance. And in doing so, it quietly invites us to reflect on ourselves.

Reflections

• When watching The Traitors, who do you find yourself drawn to — and why?

• What behaviours trigger a strong reaction in you: deception, silence, confidence, uncertainty?

• How do you notice yourself responding to mistrust or ambiguity in your own life?

• What does the show stir about belonging, exclusion, or being believed?

• In moments of pressure, do you recognise any of your own coping strategies reflected back at you?

• What does your fascination with the show reveal about how you understand human behaviour — and yourself?